CREATURE FEATURE// THE DRUMMER//Diagnostic Criteria for Identifying a Drummer | Metal, Jazz & Animal
SPECIES IDENTIFICATION: Diagnostic Criterion for Identification of the Drummer.
FIELD NOTE // Drummer ClassificationFIELD OBSERVATIONS AND PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE COLLECTED BY Laverna the Rockin’ Raccoon WRITTEN & PHOTOGRAPHED BY Alethea F. Mehdipour- Slightly Feral Media PUBLISHED BY My Midlife Crisis Creative Inc.
PREFACE// THE DRUMMER DISCREPANCY
Then she received inside information. One drummer, Adam Lichtenauer of Moire, was playing for three of the bands. This changed the evening’s field conditions considerably. The raccoon began watching with greater interest. One drummer. Three metal bands. Three separate opportunities to observe the same creature operating at full metal capacity.
The specimen was metal AF.
Later, the raccoon encountered a jazz drummer at The Bad Cat, Brian Steever. He was playing with the Danny Embry Trio.
This was when the comparison began. At first, the metal drummer appeared more feral.The evidence seemed obvious: three bands, heavy music, a Warehouse habitat, and a drummer who had apparently decided that one set of drums needed to serve multiple metal operations in a single evening.
But the raccoon kept watching.
The jazz drummer was jazz AF.
And eventually, the raccoon reached the only conclusion supported by the evidence.
A drummer is a drummer.
They are all Animal from the Muppets.
The species may appear in metal habitats, jazz habitats, punk habitats, rock habitats, basements, ballrooms, dive bars, large stages, tiny stages, and rooms where there is barely enough space for a drum kit and a human being with opinions.
The habitat affects the presentation. It does not change the creature.
THE DRUMMER// DIAGNOSTIC CRITERION ONE: The drummer must strike things with intention.
This is the primary indicator.
The drummer does not merely hit the drums. The drummer communicates with them through a highly developed system of force, timing, instinct, and probably some kind of ancient arrangement that the rest of us were not informed about.
The metal drummer communicated in metal. The jazz drummer communicated in jazz.
THE DRUMMER// DIAGNOSTIC CRITERION TWO: The drummer must appear to be listening to something that no one else can fully hear.
A drummer is never simply keeping time. Yes, they are keeping time. They are extremely good at keeping time. Time is in there somewhere, being handled responsibly.
But they are also listening.
They hear the shifts before they happen. They know where the music is going. They know when the room needs to hold its breath, when it needs to move, and when the rest of the band is about to need a much larger floor beneath them.
This can look calm in a jazz habitat. It can look like Animal from The Muppets has been given access to a metal drum kit in a Warehouse habitat.
THE DRUMMER// DIAGNOSTIC CRITERION THREE: Visible feralness is not the same as actual feralness.
The metal drummer was visibly feral. Three bands. Heavy music. Full metal habitat.
The jazz drummer looked more contained at first. Less visibly chaotic. Less likely to be mistaken for a creature who had escaped from a very loud forest.
But this was context, not a lack of feralness.
At The Bad Cat, the jazz drummer was exactly as feral as the metal drummer at Warehouse on Broadway.
The animal had simply adapted to the ecosystem.
Jazz AF is not less than metal AF. It is just jazz AF.
THE DRUMMER// DIAGNOSTIC CRITERION NUMBER FOUR: The drummer will make the rest of the room make sense.
The drummer turns a room full of separate humans, instruments, cables, moods, and noise into a single moving thing. At Warehouse, that thing was heavy. At the Bad Cat, that thing was jazzy.
The raccoon did not need the two drummers to sound alike, look alike, or occupy the same kind of stage.
THE RACCOON HAS LEFT THE BUILDING
This is written somewhat in jest. But there is truth to it.
As the raccoon has dug deeper into the bands, artists, subcultures, habitats, and ecosystems of the live-music world, she has been impressed by the crossovers musicians contain. Metal and jazz, in particular, seem to align more often than she expected.
Then the raccoon thought about it some more. It began to make sense.
Jazz is a lot like life. Complicated. Sometimes unresolved. Occasionally dissonant. A conversation can go somewhere unexpected. A moment can be delicate, then sharp, then suddenly beautiful in a way no one could have planned.
Metal is also a lot like life. A good trash-crash cymbal can communicate the harsh realities life offers. There is a place in art for ugliness because sometimes life is ugly. Sometimes the pressure builds until something has to break loose.
But both are also like life in their beauty.
There are unexpected harmonies. Things align surprisingly well even though they should not. There is softness and tenderness hidden inside metal that may appear more obvious in jazz, but it exists just the same.
Both require listening. Both require trust. Both can make a room full of separate humans become one thing for a few minutes. Art has always reflected life. Music is no different.
The raccoon came looking for some metal and some jazz.
Instead, she found Animal.
CONDUCT YOUR OWN FIELD RESEARCH
FIELD NOTE COMPLETE
The room left evidence. The raccoon collected it.
Slightly Feral. Entirely Capable.
— Laverna the Rockin’ Raccoon 🦝🖤
Slightly Feral Media
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| 📷 Barefoot Lifestyle Photography |
This is Alethea—the photographer, stagehand, behavior scientist, and designated human attached to this operation.
She documents the people, rituals, machinery, and beautiful disorder of live culture. She carries the camera, follows the evidence, and keeps wandering into places most humans never think to look.
The raccoon provides supervision. Obviously.
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